I was in a market in Hawaii trying to choose a pineapple when an older Hawaiian gentleman came over to me and asked what I was doing. (I was smelling the pineapple to see if it was ripe).
He told me that there is only one sure way to tell a pineapple was a good one. Which coincidentally was the same way to tell if a man was a good one.
Pat the butt to make sure it is firm, pull the hair (leaves?) and some should be coming off and squeeze it a bit in the center to make sure there is a little squish.
I was never sure if he was hitting on me or just doing his grocery store bit but that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
