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Hi Baby You're looking at $ 5 K in Mortuary service fees... Which includes all of the health department stuff and death certificates...
About $ 2 K for the Casket...
And Cremation is not that much cheaper...
At the Cemetery you're looking at another $ 5 K for the plot, concrete bunker, sealant, labor, etc...
Headstones run an average of another $ 2 K...
If you're having a celebration of life ceremony, you're looking at another $ 3 to $ 5 K depending upon how elaborate you want to get...
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Burial at sea. Middle of the night. Do it yourself.
Boat rental cost minimal.
Try Neptune Society. They do the whole thing.
Was 2 k prepaid back in the day I signed.
Good luck
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R2d26 I don't think cremation is an option for them.
I think Costco has the best deals on caskets. I think the funeral home has to accept a Costco casket.
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This isn’t a joke. Costco (not all local stores) sells caskets. It can be shipped directly to the mortuary.
Pete is pretty close on costs. Grave site cost varies tremendously based on cemetery and location within the cemetery. It sounds weird... but it’s like a real estate purchase. The more affluent the neighborhood... the more expensive the plot... in most cases. Meaning a plot in Santa Monica will be more expensive than a plot in West Covina which will be more expensive than San Bernardino. You get the point.
It’s good to investigate early. It takes the pressure off of having to make a decision on the spot.
Shopping pre-need almost always gets you a better deal then when at the time of the need.
Check with multiple mortuaries. Prices can vary greatly.
I know you said cremation is not an option... but for others reading, there are cremation packages as low as $700 and that includes picking up the remains from the morgue and delivering to the crematory.
Urns cost extra. For that price you get a plastic box.
Sorry to read about your mom. These times can be difficult and stressful. For families.
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Sorry to hear goth chick.
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Where the fuck is Fubar? Isn't he a mortician?
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Very helpful point.
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Most “Christian” belief systems accept cremation as an acceptable form of interment.
They consider the final disposition of the physical body to be be of little consequence. The eternal parts of a person (soul & spirit) live on elsewhere. They want it treated respectfully.... but that is primarily for the comfort of those left to mourn.
For many generations the early church practiced cremation.
That is where the famous phrase “ashes to ashes, dust to dust” comes from.
Cremation does in an hour what nature does over time.
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When I go..... cement blocks, HB pier, midnight.... You’re all invited.
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If your mom was in the armed forces, she may qualify for burial at a Veteran's Cemetery. If her husband was buried at a Veteran's Cemetery, she could be buried with him.
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Not just the real estate, the costs of all services can vary from place to place, even from the same company.
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Perhaps your mother would think differently about cremation if she knew that first her body would be used by a University of California medical school for research.
Below link is for UCSD. Other schools closer to you, such as Irvine, might have similar programs.
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what a difficult question to ask. and answer to seek.
so you knoe you can do a catholic or christian ritual / burial / memorial
at a jewish cementary
even if your not jewish.
if that helps you open your eyes.
but in a note of sustainbility.
you could have her cremated into a process that turns her into a tree.
perhaps you have a family home where the tree can grow?
or a church etc that will let you plant it?
also u can get burried above ground in a mozaleum. they are the walls at cementaries.
surely the company she work for with the money for this. has referrals? customer service? to help educate you in the process.
also the more short notice the higher the bill.
also certain religions require certain things be done to the body etc
so it depends.
perhaps you can bury her out of state as well.
one think ive never seen is cementaries in las vegas?
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^helps you open your eyes. i meant options
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I have asked my family and friends not to claim my body after I die. The county will dispose of me at taxpayer expense. It's a cost effective option.
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My older sister won’t let me go against moms wishes I 100% agree that if she wanted the most expensive option there is perhaps she should have considered skipping idk maybe the 15-20 trips to the casino and saved for it..... but whatever everyone has their vices I’m sure mine will say same about me and Home Depot and my advance directive that gives specific instructions. it would be ridiculous if they actually do it I said I wanted them to pull the plug cremate me the cheapest way possible they can even skip the urn put me in a tiny vial for each to keep with them forever my funeral will be a rave at a cemetery spread my ashes near a tree that has good view of the dance floor if they can’t afford carnival swings 😂
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Funeral directors prey on the family grief and guilt. As mentioned, you need not purchase the coffin from them. Costco, also other “Coffin Stores” are around. Also the burial vault, need not be a high end type. Ya gotta be tough and shrewd. They must, by law provide an itemized list of cost. That’ when you start eliminating all the fluff. Hang in there, I’ve been through it with my parents and my brother.
Also, if your mom is a Catholic. The Archdiocese has a program called Catholic Charities. They can work with you.
Good Luck Sweetie
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Let your sister take care of the financial part since she is so insistent
I could pay lots for a funeral but I prefer to have my ashes float in to nature
And not pretend I am still around some how because I can be found
Taking up spaces some where. I can accept that I really will be gone.
We are running out of room on our planet. Which is on borrowed time to boot now
Anyway,
Sorry for your loss and pain
Good luck
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Cremation in OC = $750
Tell your sister the body is just the vessel not the soul, plus you can carry a part of mom with you all the time in a locket.
Win win
I'm renting a helicopter to drop my carc-ass into a volcano on the Big Island.
Voyage to the Center of the Earth
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going against a deceased wishes is a great way to start a feud.
my grandmother fell down in the backyard while my dad was at work. my stepmom was out shopping for groceries.
p
grandma wailed for a while and paramedics were called by neighbors.
my two aunts and 1 uncle was pissedo that grandma was left alone. that started a feud that lasted almost 40 years until my dad passed away. they refused to go to his burial.
family shit is deep.
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We took the Costco casket price to the funeral home. They immediately offered to match the price.
A mean thought. You could cremate her. She will never know.
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She'll know, then come back to haunt your house. That's how moms are.
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@Yo_Pauly.... genius move.
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Not if he's married. OC Coroner will go after his wife for sure due to the legal marriage license.
If not married, they will call next of kin and tell you there's law listing everybdy who's responsible to pay and that it's illegal to not claim a body, lol. Stand firm, tell them no.
Contact them for more info,
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Start with the where. Start close and move out and get pricing. The farther you go, the cheaper the land. Then do the same thing with the mortuary service. If you have picked a more economical cemetery they will probably have recommendations on who to pick. Get everything in writing. Third, you pick the service that will pick up the body when its time. If the cemetery does it, it is $500 to finance their kick-back. If you pre-arrange it, you are in the driver's seat (no intentional pun). If you pick a cemetery and mortuary that is a distance you may have to spend a bit more but it will save in the long run. Everyone goes through it. Ask local relatives and friends, like doing what you are ding now. Beware of signing for a funeral plot and getting hit with huge fees once your mother is there. It is a business. Some won't, some might.
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An ex GF of mine had her father cremated and some of his ashes sent into space.
There are different options like launched into orbit for several months then the space craft re-enters and burns up looking like a shooting star or sent to the moon.
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I agree with SixD and OCCityboy....
As much family consensus as you can get is important in times like these. Grief makes people do weird things and the emotional scars often never heal.
Saving a few bucks now probably isn’t worth years of damaged relationships. These are the moments when old feuds, unspoken past slights and family schisms show up.
Thankfully, it sounds like there isn’t a lot of money/assets at stake. That makes things even uglier.
Be as kind and accommodating to each other as you can afford.
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You are now doing the smartest thing possible, planning preened. In the Judeo-Christian tradition it is dust to dust. Fancy metal caskets and embalming process that slow or stop the process of returning back to dust are unnecessary. A funeral is simply a process for the living to say goodby to the decease and to allow the living to move on with their lives. It should not burden living.
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Yeah I’m thinking I’m gonna talk to my mother about it and just be like “Reinbursed or not it’s plain and simple too much for me and my younger bros we are struggling to keep our heads above water. I don’t think it’s realistic to expect us to have a couple grand any time soon (if ever we inherited terrible spending habits). Is there any way you can work something out with catholic charities or perhaps keep in mind that we are poor af and compromise a little tell sis your decision? “
Because damn. Way more expensive than I imagined. We are wayyyyy too poor to bury her. There’s no way I have to talk to her
Thanks guys you’re awesome
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Just an idea, and I've heard worse causes, have you considered putting up a go fund me?
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Somebody said cremation is not that much cheaper, that's not true. Had a family member pass a few years back, we did cremation and it was a lot cheaper. No casket, no funeral home charges for storing, embalming, preparing the body and all the other crap they do and no cemetery plot or fees, no hearse, no funeral home expenses for viewing of the body. A funeral with cremation could cost you half or less than a traditional funeral.
There's a casket company downtown that will ship the casket to your funeral home, it was half the cost of the funeral home. There's also something called direct burial, I don't remember the specifics but it was cheaper, I'm sure you can Google it and find more info.
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I’ve been through this a few times and it sure is helpful to the relatives to have this in place beforehand. End of the day, you can only do what you can do. Don’t go into debt.
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If you’re having financial difficulties, check out Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University. That shit will set your ass straight and get you on the path to financial well being.
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I just went through this not too long ago and since sibs were assholes and I couldn't front the whole bill, I did a cemetery that is in IE. Much better rates there than in LA.
Just think that you have to get as far from LA as possible. Go east or north. West isnt really an option and south is just as bad as LA.
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I just went through this.
All the seriousness above is true. I would say try to say try to stay to your moms wishes.
Without a plot or mausoleum space, you are looking at 12K.(Casket 2K, Services 5K, Priest 500, Church 800-1K, Interment(actual burial)2K, Mausoleum plate/headstone 2K)
Luckily, my mother already had one.
Right now, you can set up a payment plan. But you won't be able to do so after she passes away.
Prayers to you and your family.
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One way to make it the MOST expensive is to not make a deal until after the death. Cemeteries and funeral homes charge premiums for hurry-up service. You get a discount for paying ahead of time. -
Not to be unkind, but it is actually a lot like buying a plane ticket. The further ahead you buy, the more you save.
I sincerely hope everything works out for you, under the trying circumstance you face.
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My buddy asked me where I wanted my ashes deposited.
Let's just say that one of you ladies is in for a big surprise.
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A couple of items assuming Cremation is out. A parents passing can wreck havoc on a family so it is best to be clear on everything as much as possible
1. I'm sorry to hear about your circumstance. I know there is no easy path
2. Make sure your mom has a will as you don't want the government taking it. Make sure she also identifies who is getting what. The loss of a loved one creates stupid decisions.
3. Burials Costs (funeral prep, priest, church, burial plot, etc..) are expensive and preparation is the best way to save a bit here and there. Costco (like others said) has caskets that funeral homes are required to use.
4. Check prices on everything and negotiate. Check multiple funeral homes and churches. Unfortunately it still will cost alot.
5. Saving a few bucks on a cremation against the wishes of your mom and family is a tough one and honestly probably not worth the rift that it will cause. A cremation and scattered ashes is the way to go for me.
6. Others have listed ways to save (cemetery plots away from LA are cheaper, Caskets, use of Funeral Homes vs Churches,
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Im sorry you are going through this. I believe Social Services may be able to help. Doesn't hurt to check their site. Otherwise you are looking at 10k. Most churches offer assistance as well.
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IrvineAshley is accurate...+10k is about the average cost for a funeral. It sucks that it costs so much. I hope your mom lives much longer that expected. I recently had a family member past away but we sort of new it wasn't going to be more than a few months before her death. It's really painful to see someone go through so much pain and suffering but it's always best to prepare. Blessings to your mom.
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There are 40 comments on this blog. This blog is locked and no further comments are permitted. |