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CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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So many Arabic men are on edge with selfie verification, while my Latino sweeties be doing this…
Oct 14 2024 12:25PM more by CoachMila
Tags: Random

Latino sweeties send me a gallery of pics from a BBQ. I get to learn all about their family—so much energy, and just super transparent. LOVE that!

White guys? I get a photo of them golfing, boating, doing a toast or hanging with their fur buddy. Calm energy, also transparent. No surprises there!

Asian men can be a bit shy, but they’ll send a selfie to make sure I know they’re safe. Very kind, very mindful. The Filipinos, though, might be a tad paranoid, like I’m going to show up at their church or something. LOL!

Black men? Pretty chill too. They send a selfie no problem—usually at work (IT), the gym, or in their car eating a sandwich. Classic. LOL!

Now, Arabic men—yes, they do spoil a sister. But I’m too old to be playing detective! I need to preserve my energy. They’re always hesitant to send a selfie, overly anxious about everything, and just so tense. It’s like, OK, we get it! They need a massage before the massage!

Indian men? Oh boy, they’re either super gentle, classy and submissive, or they’re more paranoid than the Arab men! Indian men can be so extremely skittish like they have serious mineral deficiencies and lacking hydration! Energy is too high strung, and ungrounded. Getting me paranoid too. No middle ground—just extremes w them:

At the end of the day, we’re all human. But let’s be real—my stereotypes might have a little truth to them, don’t ya think?

Ladies, I know you feeling me!

Coach Mila aka Prostate Specialist
      
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loucfirr1
LA, CA
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since Jun 29 2008

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Oct 14 2024 02:43PM     link to this

So you won't see me of I am an old fat white man?
HungryMan4u
Santa Clarita, North of LA, LA, CA
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since Dec 30 2021

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Oct 14 2024 03:07PM     link to this

Jewish men?
hercule
OC, CA
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since May 2 2006

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Oct 14 2024 03:36PM     link to this

People need to stop generalizing based on race or country of origin. Every person is different and will react differently to a situation. I don't get the obsession about putting people in boxes or folders.
We see way too much of that by politicians already.
Rogers911
Rancho Cucamonga, Inland Empire, CA
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since Sep 1 2016

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Oct 14 2024 06:28PM     link to this

^ this I'm latino and I won't send pics. It's not needed imo. Just ask for a description and I'll give it. Can't have my identity leaked. Imagine Batman sending a selfie of himself without the mask. No way.
Marrisa_G
San Diego, CA
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since Sep 23 2021

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Oct 14 2024 07:33PM     link to this

LMAO

What you have described is SO TRUE!

But I wonder if the paranoid ones, regardless of race, are really just afraid of getting deported if they get caught.

If their screening information is sketchy I usually ask for a selfie of them holding up x-fingers (where x changes randomly and regularly). If they still object then I am like, "WTF - my ring doorbell is going to capture your picture anyway, what's the big deal?" If they go silent then I just assume I caught one of those first responder types that we desperately try to avoid (they never want to get outed with a pic of themselves).
socaliam
CA
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Oct 14 2024 09:27PM     link to this

This blog is entertaining.

Get off the race card, OP is sharing her observations from her experiences. Marisa, always the calm insiteful blogger, agrees with her.

OmarS
Santa Ana, OC, CA
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Oct 15 2024 04:34AM     link to this

Arab here. It's called discretion.
mrpussy12
OC, CA
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since Mar 11 2020

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Oct 15 2024 07:53AM     link to this

I’m not sending any photos/selfies and I’m Latino.

I like to surprise the ladies with my looks…and tongue.
ragingbull7
Encino, SFV, LA, CA
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since May 1 2019

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Oct 15 2024 01:18PM     link to this

armenians?
pt_atwl
La Jolla, San Diego, CA
City of San Diego, San Diego, CA Today!
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Oct 15 2024 02:45PM     link to this

LOL. Well I don't know what category I fall in. I sent @Marrisa_G a selfie before she even asked :-)
CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 15 2024 10:32PM     link to this

Mr. Pussy. But Fancy Latinos shopping at South Coast don’t count tho… 😘

Next…

CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 15 2024 11:18PM     link to this

Jewish men—aww, gotta love ’em. In my experience, they’re like an open book, maybe the most fearless selfie-senders on the planet. They’ll even introduce themselves with their full name, like they’re running for office. 🤣

Ask for a selfie? They’ll hit you with a business card and a selfie. Talk about efficiency! LOL! And don’t be surprised if they’re the ones waving at you across the produce aisle at the market—nothing to hide. They’re also masters at picking low-drama ladies and definitely do their research. Jewish men, usually zero drama!

Now, Armenian men—no matter the age, they’re pretty old school. You ask for a selfie, and boom, they’ll send that and sometimes their driver’s license for good measure. But there’s a twist: they’re loyal, like super loyal, and expect you to be all theirs. I mean, they probably think you’re just sitting around waiting for them all day. Their typical text? “Hey, can I see you in 30 minutes?” 😂🤣🙄 but total romantic sweetie pies.

And folks…
If one is not sending a selfie? There are 3 reasons:

1. They don’t trust you
2. They’ve got a detective partner who doesn’t trust them
3. There’s a hidden agenda

That vibe says it all!

Don’t be desperate ladies. Every man out there that values you and your time will send a selfie if their energy is for the right intention!

So…next!
CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 15 2024 11:25PM     link to this

Marissa G!
Never thought about that when in SD. Great POV.
Oh, and to hold up a sign is a brilliant idea.

Sis! Thanks so much!
LOVE YA!
CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 15 2024 11:28PM     link to this

Or
4. They fear of getting deported, like Ms. Marissa stated
loucfirr1
LA, CA
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Oct 16 2024 12:25AM     link to this

5. Being rejected
AFMadness
Inland Empire, CA
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since Aug 17 2009

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Oct 16 2024 09:25AM     link to this

3a. keeping an Aura of Mystery.

One thing about being here, I have become very comfortable in my own skin and gained a lot of self-confidence.
fatboy_1990
Fullerton, OC, CA
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Oct 16 2024 10:23AM     link to this

What if you’re Russian and Roman line me?

Rushin’ hands and roamin’ fingers.
CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 16 2024 11:07AM     link to this

Russian men and their selfies—straight to the point. It’s like, “Here’s my face, don’t worry about anything else.”

The selfie’s so close, zoomed in like they took it 2 inches away from their face.
I could probably do their skincare routine.🤪

They’re making sure you don’t catch the messy room, pizza box or the car seat in the background. Serious expression, half-smile, like they’re solving world problems while snapping the pic. Sometimes I feel like their modeling, w the raised eyebrow and all. Hahahaha

Meanwhile, Asian guys? Full-blown smiles, like it’s school photo day. 🤓 They’re like, “Here’s my charming smile mama, enjoy it!” Russians? “Just the face. No distractions. We’re here for business.”
TomD92801
OC, CA
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Oct 16 2024 03:27PM     link to this

Why do you need a selfie on HX?

There are plenty of ways to screen on HX without a requiring a selfie. This site is based on sharing information but being discreet. Why should I send a picture of myself to someone whom I will visit for just a moment, and risk being exposed to others outside of HX or even extorted with that picture?

Paranoid? Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean someone's not out to get me...

There's no upside to sending a pic. What are you looking for in a pic? Yes, he's just as ugly as the girls I've pm'd said he is.

Girls share pics to entice guys to visit with them, which is completely understandable. But even that usually isn't enough. Guys will pm others in her network to determine if she's one he wants to visit.

Why does what a guy looks like matter to a girl?

I'm a Marine - we're all green.

And the color of money is for the most part green.

What more do you need?

As a side note, back in the day, I almost made it through the door until a girl looked through the peep hole and saw me. Never answered it... And I don't blame her...

Maybe that's why you need the selfie...?

Maybe that's why I don't want to send one?

Oh yeah, one time also back in Troothsayer days a girl asked for a pic and I told her I couldn't send a face pic, but I sent her a pic of me enjoying 69. That was good enough for her! She became one of my regulars!

Never send a selfie.

There are plenty who don't require it and they're just as fun!
socaliam
CA
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since Sep 3 2007

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Oct 16 2024 04:44PM     link to this

I've never been asked for a selfie. I don't do them, ever, so I'd just politely move on.
Tatiana36dd
NC
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Oct 16 2024 09:50PM     link to this

In Clinical Research its always the person with no degress or no post-graduate defree that is the most distrustful and unfortunately the most under representative in all our studies. We struggle to get thise groups in studies because of the "concerns " you mention. In general paranoia. Sad but true. We have too many masters degrees and bachelor degree peeps. They get it but the minority and non degree peeps don't trust anything.
TomD92801
OC, CA
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Oct 17 2024 09:16AM     link to this

Clinical studies and educational degrees have nothing to do with providing a selfie on this site.

Unless the person has very few references through the rating system, there's no need to ask or provide a selfie.

Although I'm a Marine, I have a post graduate degree, and consider myself fairly intelligent, intelligent enough to not provide a selfie in a situation where discretion is paramount, and divulging personal information including a picture can have grave consequences.
loucfirr1
LA, CA
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Oct 17 2024 09:47AM     link to this

What is the reason for a photo?

Safety? They could just send a fake pic.
Tatiana36dd
NC
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Oct 17 2024 01:00PM     link to this

Usually they send a D pic lol.
Tatiana36dd
NC
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Oct 17 2024 01:07PM     link to this

I definitely have gotten some pics with very large features for a latin or asian man..true trivia that the largest features of men are typically in the Congo and the smallest in north Korea. Now of course sample sizes of these population have the standard 5% margin of error but in general I find this accurate. Fun fact!
GrlNxtDoor619
San Diego, CA
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Oct 17 2024 01:44PM     link to this

The hypocrisy is mind boggling. Many of you are blessed that your photos aren't shared on this site because providers see creatures out of this world... It's great that many of us see beyond what's foreskin deep. (Hahahaa)
Rogers911
Rancho Cucamonga, Inland Empire, CA
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Oct 17 2024 01:53PM     link to this

^ visiting OC?
pronth
San Diego, CA
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Oct 18 2024 06:35AM     link to this

So, after you verify us with our selfies…
What do you do with the photo?
Keep it for your records, ad to contact card, delete?
sinful_one66
LA, CA
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Oct 18 2024 09:51AM     link to this

I have a hard time send a selfie for verification. Lots of ladies use old pix that aren’t very representative. I’ve asked for “proof of life” pix and all I get is hate. As far as I’m concerned, I look like Ben Franklin, if you get my drift.

To conclude, I’m one of those paranoid ones and don’t post my face on SM or send to anyone I’ve never met.
sinful_one66
LA, CA
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Oct 18 2024 09:56AM     link to this

Also, cruise ladies photo albums, tons of pix with blurred faces or no heads.
CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 18 2024 07:09PM     link to this

All selfies are destroyed!
Never save them.
Why we need them:
#1 Safety, especially if their coming to our home
#2 Make sure it’s not a friend’s husband or someone we know
#3 Read the energy
Tatiana36dd
NC
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Oct 19 2024 07:55AM     link to this

Coach has good reasons for her screening methods. I ask for linkedin withva photo snap and most comply. I had one or two engineers that would bot do linkedin but sent snaps of their engineering computer drawings and should me their computer time stamps so I knew it was real. One guy was very proud of his drawings and showed ofc the portions that he could. I appreciate the creativity when it comes to making me comfortable. I prefer them giving job proof anove anything else. It tells me alot about thrm. I do the same with dating in the real world. I ask straight up for the linkedin and especially if I meet them at a dive bar. Good jobs and established networks like linkedin can be an aphrodisiac for gals.
Tatiana36dd
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Oct 19 2024 07:59AM     link to this

Coach is right also on reason number 2 with fear of doing a colleagues husband. I have some nursing friends that I feel their husbands are very horny and would ventures out. I would never do a friends husband unless it were an open swinging situation.
Emerson1999
Inland Empire, CA
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Oct 19 2024 05:29PM     link to this

in Arabic, and I'm young dumb and full of cum
witler5
OC, CA
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since Feb 18 2020

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Oct 19 2024 06:16PM     link to this

Arabphobia
witler5
OC, CA
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Oct 19 2024 06:17PM     link to this

maybe cause more religious
June.Moon
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 19 2024 06:37PM     link to this

Id love to get more screening tips if you don't mind


Can I message you?
Alexisalexis2.0
LA, CA
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Oct 27 2024 05:57AM     link to this

Coach you are spot on with your selfie descriptions lmfao. I don't ask for them but I often receive them unsolicited. You are correct to the point of hilarity with every point made 😂 From Jewish guys and their full names to Armenians with the "can I see you now? In 3 minutes?" ( They are the best when you need a recommendation for well like anything. Car insurance? They gotta friend. Need an apt,? They got the hook up. Need your lashes done? Their cousin just opened a salon.)

Everyone who hated on this post needs to get a grip. To act as though culture doesn't influence behavior or that generalizations can't be noted upon in good spirit is just so boring. Like have you all never watched comedy? It's what makes the vast majority of stand up entertaining and relatable .

Side note - where are you finding all the Arab clients at cuz they are few and far between for me. 😥 I promise I won't even ask for a selfie hahaha.
socaliam
CA
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Oct 27 2024 07:38PM     link to this

Boomer snowflake ❄️ 😆
lapierre
Seal/Sunset Beach, OC, CA
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Oct 28 2024 12:47PM     link to this

i guess i am really from congo, didnt realize that.
with really light colored skin tho.


ArabianQueen
Corona, Inland Empire, CA
Pasadena, SGV, LA, CA Today!
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Oct 28 2024 02:49PM     link to this

I’m Arabic and love Arabic men
ArabianQueen
Corona, Inland Empire, CA
Pasadena, SGV, LA, CA Today!
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Oct 28 2024 02:51PM     link to this

But yes it’s discretion
remo_williams
Irvine, OC, CA
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Oct 29 2024 11:41AM     link to this

Hmm I must not be white, as I don't golf, and don't have a dog.

I might be part Filipino or Indian, as I won't send a pic.

I haven't yet I bothered to waste a gals time to see if they might make an exception to a pic rule if they state it in their advertisement or profile.

I certainly respect the right to request one, and kudos to those who want to avoid people that might run in the same circles........ but count me paranoid I suppose, but If I were to send a picture, and in the lottery Powerball chance that the gal knows me, and thus refuses to see me, how do I know she turns me down as we know the same people?

I'd be more concerned about that pic being used to blackmail a potential client - but that's just my perspective, I can certainly empathize where the gals perspective would be 180 degrees opposite of mine.
CoachMila
Irvine, OC, CA
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Nov 9 2024 12:21PM     link to this

❤️
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